Some of the reasons I am a Post-Charismatic, and barely holding on to that…III

There is a lot of abuse among the teens that come to our teen center. I don’t have any exact numbers but I know from conversations that most girls have been sexually abused, a lot of the guys have have been physically abused. There is so much violence done to them in so many ways. Most of that violence comes from fathers.

It is hard to explain what that does to a young person. To keep themselves safe they develop all kinds of ways to put distance between what hurts them and themselves. Very often those defense mechanisms also push much of everything that would help them away as well.

Like God.

If God is anything like a Father I want nothing to do with him. If he’s anything like “my” dad, he doesn’t give rip about me, just beats me whenever he feels like it or crawls in bed with me whenever he gets horny. Uses me, abuses me, laughs at me, belittles me and then blames me for it all.

I think I saw glimpses of that “god” on some You Tube vidoes from the Lakeland Outpouring. I hadn’t seen anything or read much simply because I couldn’t care less and I didn’t want to make this a Todd Bentley issue. He’ll have to own and deal with his part and my prayer still is that he could do so among a loving and caring community.

But I was in tears as I watched people getting punched and kicked, disrespected in all kinds of ways, in a circus style fashion in the name of god. I was mortified as I heard stories being told about this violence to the amusement of the crowds. God is telling us to punch people, kick them, disrespect them so that they can be healed and understand better God’s gentleness and love for us??????

The healing ministry of that “god” I won’t have any part of. The “apostles” supporting and providing covering for this “out-pouring” I won’t have any part of either. That “god”, I won’t have any part of either.

I will support a healing ministry that is about restoration. Physical, Emotional, Social, Racial etc, etc. I will support a kind, loving, gentle, respectful movement towards wholeness. I will submit to and support Apostles, male and female, who model the gentle and kind heart of the Father, who lives and breathes the nurturing Mother heart of God, God in one, mother and father, instructing the different tribes of God in how to love, drawing these broken and hurt little one towards God for restoration.


~ by Rickard on August 30, 2008.

4 Responses to “Some of the reasons I am a Post-Charismatic, and barely holding on to that…III”

  1. Bill Kinnon says your in Idaho. What parts? I was born in Nampa and raised in Meridian.

  2. We are in Star, Idaho, 10 minutes outside of Eagle Id,

    Where are you now?

  3. San Diego. Its been 20 years since I last lived there. I grew up in a neighborhood of Meridian with about a half dozen or so boys my age. All of us living with our divorced moms. Man did we run the streets and get in a lot of trouble. I was a headache for my mom so she finally sent me to live with my dad in Southern Cal…and how three years later I came to know the Lord.

    I think fondly back on the state. In many ways I wish I could return. We’ll see I suppose.

    Glad you are working with the kids now up there. God bless.

  4. If you come up here, look me up. It would be cool to meet

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